


Not That Old

by Ayceek (fuckuharold)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blind Date, Captain America - Freeform, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Modern Bucky Barnes, Psychological Trauma, Slow Build, Steve Rogers and the 21st Century, but not overly described
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 10:33:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8368981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuckuharold/pseuds/Ayceek
Summary: "You need to promise me you won't freak out and still go.""I'm halfway through town to meet a stranger, I think that's too late for me to back out.""Okay okay, fair enough. You'll try no matter what, right?""I told you. We'll have plenty in common I'm sure and we'll be best mates by the end of our first cup of coffee.""He's 96.""What? Natasha? Nat-" Bucky was met with the dial tone. or AU where Bucky goes to meet one of Natasha's old friend. And by old, she does actually mean old. It eventually turns out into a blind date.





	

**Author's Note:**

> _Disclaimer:_ This work is pure fan fiction and while it's based on the public personas of real people, it doesn't imply anything about their behavior in real life.  
>  I do not own, even partially, Marvel Studios or Marvel Entertainment and no money is being made from this story.  
> Based on its content this fanfiction should not be shared with anyone even remotely connected to the MCU or the actors interpreting those characters in the movies.
> 
>  _Warnings:_ This story contains war references and the lose of a limb.
> 
>  _Note:_ English isn't my native language and I apologize in advance for any grammatical mistakes you could find even after proofreading. For any translation work relating on this story, people contact me on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/AyceekComics).

Bucky wasn't exactly sure what got him into this mess in the first place but clearly karma was testing him.

  
When Natasha told him she had a friend to introduce, Bucky has been surprised to say the least. The guy apparently needed to see people and live a little, and Bucky being quite the hermit, he was most certainly going to fail. He was all about helping people and making them happy but topics of conversation weren't his forte, and boring Natasha's friend even more was probably the only thing he would accomplish.

  
But then, Natasha got really persuasive, told him it would do him some good to meet new people outside of the sick and depressed veterans he took care of—which was rude by the way, they were extremely lovely; so Bucky, weak old Bucky Barnes, said yes and managed to get excited about the prospect of meeting this guy. He knew his name was Steve, and was also a veteran. Besides, despite the fact he didn't really like to go out, he was actually a really fun and talkative person who enjoyed a good muffin with his coffee. Natasha took care of the date, _friendly_ date she reminded him, and told them to meet each other at a coffee near the Brooklyn Bridge at two.

Bucky was on his way when Natasha called him.

  
"Tell me you're on your way." She asked right away with no preamble.

  
"Well hello to you too, what a pleasure. Yes, I am on my way." Bucky replied sarcastically. When after a moment, Natasha still hasn't replied, Bucky checked his phone to make sure the call was still going. "Why did you call me?"

  
"You need to promise me you won't freak out and still go."

  
"I'm halfway through town to meet a stranger, I think that's too late for me to back out."

  
"Okay okay, fair enough. You'll try no matter what, right?"

  
"I told you. We'll have plenty in common I'm sure and we'll be best mates by the end of our first cup of coffee."

  
"He's ninety-six."

  
"What? Natasha? Nat-" Bucky was met with the dial tone.

 

Clearly if Bucky had known before the meeting, he would have never left his couch in the first place. And this Natasha must know as well. Telling him five minutes before seeing the guy—or man maybe? grandpa?; that he was in fact very old, wasn't what Bucky would call a friendly gesture. A heads up would have been appreciated.

  
Instead of wearing his leather jacket, fitted jeans and brown boots, he would have wore something more suitable and classy for example. He was about to meet a ninety-six year old veteran, the guy could be a war hero for all he knew, and he was wearing a leather jacket. Mentioning his long hair and cap would just be mean. He looked like a twenty-seven year old going on a date when in reality he was about to face an ex military who probably owned several medals. Ten at least.  
This whole 'we'll be best mates' suddenly seemed difficult.

  
However, if the Army taught Bucky something, it was to never back out and never be afraid of the impossible. He did pay for his reckless energy and behavior after all. He was on the ground, following his troops when something has caught his eye. Bucky Barnes, never being afraid of facing a difficulty alone left the group and turned right. He stepped on a buried mine, lost his arm, got a metallic prosthetic thanks to a genius called Tony Stark, and became veteran at twenty-five. It wasn't his greatest moment, but he managed to live through it and actually embrace his new appearance. People were either fearing him or praising him. Needless to say he did love a bit of attention. The other positive aspect of his accident was the fact that he became a VA counselor. Every three days he went round hospitals, clinics, community living centers and counseling centers, to help people like him. People who either lost a limb, a sense or people who just suffered from PTSD after returning back from the field. Bucky understood them, he was appreciated, and it probably was his new greatest accomplishment.

  
Either way, facing the unfaceable was Bucky's speciality and if meeting a ninety-six year old was going to please one of his best friends, he sure wasn't going to disappointment. Go big or go home is what they said, and he wasn't planning on going home just yet.  
Which was actually a great decision because this whole internal string of thoughts took his mind of his surroundings and he was currently facing the cafe. Time to meet a war hero.

The first thing he noticed when he stepped inside the place was the floor to ceiling windows and the beautiful marble counter. The tables and chairs were all dark but brighten by a red and cream carpet. Intimate and stylish, Bucky sure appreciated Natasha's skills to find the best spots in town. They had once gone to a freshly opened trendy bar close to Broadway and to this day Bucky could still remember the marvelous fruity cocktail a guy had offered him and the yellow glow given by the candles. Today wasn't about cute guys offering him drinks though (it was too early for that anyway), Bucky was a man on a mission and finding this Steve man was his top priority. He approached the counter and called out to one of the bartenders.

  
"Afternoon miss. A friend of mine kind of organized a blind date with one of her friends, I'm supposed to meet him here but I'm not sure where to look. His name is Steve?"

  
"It's your lucky day, the guy is a catch. Your friend sure knows how to set up blind dates. He's in the back, first table on the right." So apparently there must be several Steve people waiting alone for someone to show up.

  
"Are you sure we're talking about the same guy?"

"He asked for someone named Bucky. Is your name Bucky?"

  
"It is. I suppose I'll see then, thank you very much."

  
"You're welcome, enjoy your date. And if it doesn't work out, just tell him I'm also a lovely person and that I wouldn't mind a drink."

  
"Hm sure." Did young girls were into grandpas now? Was this a new trend Bucky wasn't aware of? He knew sometimes he had some trouble living in his time but surely something like that couldn't have escaped him. Was old the new norm? Bucky was at lost. Or maybe she knew something he didn't. Was this meeting a whole joke?

  
He headed for the back slowly, not exactly certain of what, or who, was waiting for him. He looked around briefly, a back door on the left, few windows, a fire extinguisher by the far end wall. Ten people at most, no pets, no suspicious behavior or baggage left behind. He exhaled. To say Army changed him was an understatement. He flexed his left arm and kept walking.

 

Once he stepped into the back room, more private clearly, the first person he noticed was Captain America. Which was cool, it's not like Bucky had a poster of him in his living room and books recounting his story. He also never wanked thinking about his more than impressive muscles. Not that Bucky was shallow, young and pre-serum Steve Rogers was quite the handsome guy too. And then Bucky stopped dead in this tracks.

  
Steve Rogers. Steve. Veteran. Ninety-six year old. The fucker.

  
Natasha set a blind friendly meeting with Captain America. She got to be kidding him. Bucky was having a panic attack, in a cafe a few feet away from the national idol. Bucky was going to pass out. No, first Bucky was going to call Natasha and yell at her. Then he was going to pass out. Maybe he should take some deep breaths before doing any of that. Breathing, that he knew. Breathing, living, Bucky knew how, he was an Iraq survivor. Fuck he was going to kill his best friend. Former best friend actually.

  
"Natasha I'm going to kill you and I am not even joking. This time that's it, your life is over." Bucky whisper yelled from the restroom. He might have pushed the first door he saw in his attempt to escape and got lucky it wasn't a storage closet.

  
"I take it you met my surprise." Natasha replied gladly.

  
"You call that a surprise?"

  
"Do you like it? Or should I say 'do you like him?'. I already know the answer to that question, don't bother replying. So how is he in real life? Have you already confessed your ever lasting love and now you're panicking in the men restroom?" Natasha knew him too well.

  
"I'm going to kill you."

  
"That you mentioned already."

  
"I can't fucking believe you. Steve Rogers, Captain America, war hero, national idol. What were you thinking?"

  
"You forgot 'crush' in your list, but sure he's these too. Can you thank me already and go back to him?"

  
"I'm going to kill you." Bucky hung up. He was a brave man who wasn't afraid of another man. He was a soldier. He was empowering veterans to do better, to find hobbies, to stop blaming themselves for the loss of a partner. Bucky was strong and facing Captain America should be the easiest thing on his to do list of the week. Of the month even. Bucky was going to squeak like a schoolboy but Bucky could do it.

  
He approached the table quietly, as to not startle Steve Rogers who was busy reading. The guy bought a book with him, on a meeting with a stranger, clearly he was afraid to get bored.

  
"Steve?" Bucky asked softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

  
Captain America perked up, closing his book before putting it back into his bag, hanging of the side of the chair he was sitting on. He then stood up and extended his hand for Bucky to shake, announcing his full name "Steven Grant Rogers". Such formal introduction for a widely known soldier. "I take it you're Bucky?"

  
"James Buchanan Barnes." Bucky replied, just to humor him. The effect was immediate, a soft smile taking over Steve Rogers' face. They both took a sit across from each other and ordered two cups of coffee with some pastries to share.

"It's nice to meet you. I'm sorry for this whole staging. Natasha was pretty adamant on the fact you couldn't know about me."

"What do you mean?" Bucky asked. Not for the time today, he felt like he was on the Truman Show. Everyone was knowing something he didn't and it was driving him crazy.

  
"That this whole meeting is a date. You knew that, right? I mean you did dress up quite nice."

  
Bucky was on a date with Steve Rogers, Captain America, war hero, national idol. A planned date where he apparently was the only clueless one. Even the bartender seemed to know. Bucky was so oblivious. Oblivious and blushing. Captain America told him he dressed nicely. Captain America complimented his choice of clothing. If Natasha was here to see Bucky at the moment, she would probably be laughing her ass off. She probably would be right. Bucky was an idiot, but a nicely dressed idiot he reminded himself. Captain America's words, not his.

  
"I genuinely had no idea." Bucky replied eventually. "The only thing she found important to share was that you were ninety-six. It's fine because you look in your twenties, so I have no problem with the age gap, trust me. The problem is that I was certain to meet a decorated veteran."

  
"If you're thinking about it, I am a decorated veteran." Steve answered, a smirk forcing on his pink lips. It suited him well thought Bucky.

  
"You know what I mean, Captain."

  
"Please don't call me Captain."

  
"To be completely honest with you, I'm either calling you 'Steve Rogers' or 'Captain America' in my head. You're an Avenger, I can't talk to you as if you were a normal guy."

  
"That's actually why I came here for, to be treated like a guy in his twenties trying to give dating a chance. Natasha told me you were the perfect guy for that, non judgmental and all." Bucky remained silent so Steve continued. "I know my job is slightly different, and I'm aware I've missed a lot of things when I was…away" Steve eventually settled on, "but what I really want is just for people to see me as Steve Rogers, a guy who adore dogs and cooking." At the end of his sentence, Steve's tone was sad and his eyes almost wet. Being Captain America was maybe a burden after all.

  
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. I mean, I'm wearing a leather jacket and my hair is greasy. I would have looked much better if I really was drinking coffee and stuffing my face with sugar, with your decorated self."

  
"You look just great Bucky." Steve replied, his eyes already clearer and his smile brighter.

  
Afterwards, once the pastries were served in two expensive looking plates, both men started to share more about their respective lives.

  
Steve Rogers was indeed Captain America, and most of his life was out in the open, for the whole world to see, which was something he absolutely hated. When he first got out, just to buy some groceries, too many people recognized him and he had a panic attack right in the middle of Union Street. He told Bucky about the exhibition at the Smithsonian, exposing personal cliches of his friends, his family members and some of his deepest secrets. He wasn't supposed to wake up to see all of this after all, he wasn't supposed to come back to tell the ugly truth, and deny what the museum had written. He told Bucky about the missions the books didn't recall, about some of the bad guys not being as weak as the History stated. Steve talked about some of the inhuman things he witnessed, powers he thought nobody could ever have or survive to. He also mentioned his current job, not in details because of the secrets it held, but with enough depth, that Bucky felt like he really got an insight into Steve's life.

  
In return, Bucky mentioned his time in Iraq. He mentioned the accident and Steve explained how impressed he was, how brave Bucky must be to have his life so nicely put together now. Bucky didn't mention the nightmares, the most common noises waking him up as if a bomb just blew up under his window. What he talked about however was his role at the VA center. He even proposed Steve to come someday, Steve replied he would love to; being around superheroes tended to make him forget people had weakness too.

  
Overall, Bucky and Steve didn't stop talking for hours. They ate, drunk coffee, got refills and talked some more. The cafe was slowly filling up, people going out of work, grabbing some drinks with colleagues. They barely noticed, too engrossed in each other.  
Bucky couldn't tear his gaze away. Steve's hair was blond and short, just like he imagined it to be; his muscles bulky under a blue sweater; his eyes were the most breathtaking, the bluest Bucky has ever seen. Steve Rogers was beautiful, anyone with eyes and common sense could see it, even though beauty was subjective. But there was more to see, under the surface, behind the appearance of a super soldier fighting his country's enemies, there was something delicate and almost fragile. Steve was smiling softly when he was talking about his friends, his gaze was bittersweet when he thought about the people he never got a chance to say goodbye when he let the plane crash into the ice. Steve had monsters to face, memories he could never erase. He had missed so much, barely lived despite being born in 1920, but he was wise. He wasn't afraid to share intimate details, to recall about past time, he wasn't afraid to let his emotions show, because just like he kept reminding Bucky, he was just a normal guy who once got injected a serum.

  
His body had changed, cracking a joke or two about his size and new gained strength to Bucky, but he remained the same on the inside. Captain America was a guy from Brooklyn who used to be sick and lost his mom at a young age. Bucky couldn't help but notice they had a lot in common.

  
Bucky opened up then. He talked about his sister, Rebecca, who died while he was in Iraq. He never got a chance to say goodbye either, and didn't go to her grave until a few months after he got back. Bucky was confident now, he wasn't ashamed of his missing left arm, but it was never this easy from the start. The first weeks following his repatriation were spent in a bed, room 321 of a hospital he didn't bother remembering the name. The next months have been spent in a flat he didn't recognize. He moved twice in five months. Only then did he decided to visit his sister.

  
Steve had smiled at the memory, and somehow both men understood each other. They were bend, they had both lived awful things, but they were not broken. When they parted ways that day, Bucky gave his phone number to Steve and promised him to meet again.

 

*

 

"How was it Buck Buck?" Natasha asked as soon as Bucky replied.

  
"One, I already told you not to call me like that. Two, it's none of your business."

  
"So it went okay?" Natasha guessed. Bucky's defensive mode being enough to have the confirmation. "I'm so glad. Steve deserves to be happy you know. He has been so lonely when we weren't trying the save the world. He definitely needs a man in his life."

  
"You never told me this was a date."

  
"Of course I didn't, you'd still be on your couch otherwise." When did Natasha manage to know him so well? Bucky was still uncertain. "And do not forget to thank me. Steve told me it went great, not nice, not okay, _great_. You should be happy, you did impress him and he was quite charmed by the look of yours if I interpreted his deep sights and fond tone right. He's smitten."

  
"Did Steve talk to you about me?" Bucky wondered too fast.

  
"Oh so now you're listening to me? You're quite picky Buck Buck, you're only paying attention when it's about Steve, I see. Since I'm the kindest best friend, I'll dignify your concern with a reply. He did talk about you and the most surprising of all is that he only had good things to say. You're a peach Bucky trust me, but the amount of compliments and praises he formulated was almost scary. If I didn't know you better I might think you put a smell on him."

  
"Do you honestly think he likes me?" Bucky asked bewildered. Natasha was playing him again. He was so done with her; but also quite interested in what she had to say, suddenly.

  
"Best news of the century I know, and I'm the one delivering. Please mention me in the vows of your wedding with Captain America."

  
"God I hate you."

  
"Sure. Just remember the crush is mutual. Bye Bucky, don't jerk off too hard on the big news." Buck hung up. Then he went to take a cold shower. If he screamed like a schoolboy, a flush rising into his neck and cheeks, Bucky lived alone, no one would notice.

  
*

  
After that, Bucky's life became a giant mess of Steve, counseling meetings and Natasha sounding and looking way too smug. She kept reminding him how this beautiful romance was all thanks to her, no matter how many times Bucky reminded her there was no romance. Steve and Bucky texted, a lot, but it didn't mean anything. And if it did, he was all right with ignoring the signs.

  
His romantic life hasn't always been the most glorious before his time in the Army and when he got back, let's say a tough sob story and a missing arm weren't counting in his favor. Natasha has been the only friend he managed to keep after coming home (probably because she became Black Widow in the meantime and understood him better than anyone but Bucky wasn't sure), and even though she liked to remind him he was still as handsome, smart and funny as before, even her could see Bucky was different. His laugh was forced most of the time, his smile tight and his eyes downcast.

  
Things got a bit brighter when he became in charge of counseling but somehow it reminded him of his own condition. Why was he even counseling in the first place? Oh yeah, because he was a retired veteran in his twenties after an injury that put him on the side.  
He wasn't the most joyful person, he knew that, but somehow it didn't seem to mind Steve. He had the same kind of past. The circumstances and the time weren't exactly similar, but both men had been screwed over. In Steve, Bucky finally saw someone with a shared history, a complexity he only noticed in veterans who witnessed the worse on the field. Steve was good at bringing people out, Natasha had said, and it was true. Just like she also mentioned, Steve was in fact a talkative and fun guy despite his tendency to never go out. His texts were mostly random, his selfies always showing him pulling a funny face, and Bucky had no trouble forgetting he was actually exchanging jokes and secrets with Captain America.

  
After a few weeks, Bucky had finally stopped referring to him as Steve Rogers, Captain America, war hero, national idol. He was just Steve, just like him was just Bucky. To each other, they weren't ex military, they weren't broken or facing demons, they were just two guys who happened to share a mutual crush.

  
It was probably because of, or thanks to, this crush that Bucky actually accepted Steve's invitation to meet again. They planned on a proper date, romantic this time, at Bucky's place. Steve was bringing takeout, Bucky was choosing the movie, and the rest was up to fate. To say Bucky was even more nervous than when he thought he was meeting a ninety-six year old hero, was an understatement.

  
Steve was supposed to come around seven, which left Bucky with two hours to kill. His flat was clean, his room tidy and the couch and cushions ready. His hair was tied back at the nape on his neck and for the special occasion, he even ironed a black shirt, waiting for him on a chair. Checking his reflection and inspecting his living room for about the fifth time in the last quarter, he finally decided to do something he was about to regret, give a call to Natasha.

  
"Are you freaking out?" She greeted him.

  
"No." Bucky lied. Knowing Natasha, she wasn't buying any of this.

  
"So you're calling me out of pure boredom two hours before your date with Steve?"

  
"Can't I call you whenever I want to hear your sweet voice?"

  
"If I quote you correctly you once said to me 'your voice reminds me of the high shrieks some old vehicles made when we had to use them in the desert'."

  
"Okay I'm nervous." Bucky eventually admitted. Steve was already way too important to screw this whole evening. "What if I run any of my chances with him? What if he doesn't like me anymore when we'll be in the intimacy of my own place? I'm a mess Natasha, you know I got bad PSTD, no matter how much I like to tell you I don't. What if I have a panic attack? God he's going to hate me and I'll end up all alone."

  
"Who initiated this second date?" Natasha tried reminding him.

  
"Him. Did you listen to my rant?"

  
"I did. Did you listen to the reply you just gave me?" When she wanted to, which was almost all the time, Natasha was a real pain. Bucky rolled his eyes, glad she couldn't see him.

  
"I don't see how him being the one who wants to see me again is helping with my breakdown."

  
"You just said it yourself. He's the one who wanted to see you again. Now go dress yourself, because I know you're probably still shirtless. And please, be a good host." This time, Natasha was the one who hung up first. He knew this phone call was pointless. He still listened to her and put his shirt on though. Keeping the prosthetic out of sight on the first date was one of Bucky's personal rules.

  
He also had the 'don't scare away the guy on a first night together by having a nightmare' rule; the 'don't talk about your time in Iraq in too much details' rule; the 'don't be an idiot' rule; the 'don't talk about your arm' rule; three of which he completely overruled with Steve. That's why he didn't understand how he could even be waiting for Steve to knock on his door. Maybe he had read the text wrong, but his mind kindly reminded him he read it about ten times before even thinking about replying so no, he got that sentence right: _hi this is steve, which you probably know since we've been texting for the past few weeks… ha. anyway would you like to meet again? maybe? as in a real date where we both know it's a date. let me know._

  
Bucky still had doubt about karma playing him though. Maybe this was another set up by Natasha and Steve didn't want to hurt her feelings, saying yes even though he absolutely didn't want to have anything to do with, or near Bucky. Just as he was about to internally rant again about how an idiot he was, someone knocked on the door twice.

  
It couldn't be Steve, it was still too early. Neither could it be Natasha since she knew he excepted company. He didn't have many other friends, not 'We're close enough that I come knock on your door on a Thursday night' friends anyway. Maybe a neighbor. Ready to scowl at the intruder, Bucky reached for the handle and yanked the door open.

  
Facing him was none other than Steve Rogers. Steve Rogers dressed as Captain America. Captain America was on his doorstep. Bucky hadn't sign up for this life. He was weak and he was a man with cravings and desires, urges he couldn't say no to. Obviously the first thing he all but croaked was 'You're hot' to which Steve chuckled. Rude.

  
"Thank you, I guess." Bucky, too focused on the hard muscles, couldn't even find it in himself to voice a greeting or even invite Steve inside. So much for the great host. Thankfully for him, Steve noticed his distress and let himself in, closing the door shut and maneuvering Bucky to the living area. "Are you going to talk to me or are you going to stare all evening? Not that I'm complaining."

  
Bucky finally looked up, Steve's eyes so blue and earnest. "I'm so bad at this dating thing I'm sorry. I wasn't excepting you so early, or dressed up in your uniform for that matter."

  
"Sorry about that. I had an unplanned mission with four members of the Strike team, starting late last night, and going back to mine to get a shower, get changed, debrief and come here would have taken too much time." Steve excused himself, looking sheepishly at his navy blue tights.

  
"You could have just cancelled you know. I can understand." Bucky said. Truly, he would have, he wasn't just saying that to please Steve.

  
"What if I really wanted to see you and couldn't wait?"

  
"Well in that case I suppose you did the right thing."

  
"That's what I thought." Steve replied, looking far too happy and flirty. "I couldn't miss you wearing that lovely shirt."

  
Bucky flushed under the praise, suddenly finding his lap very interesting. He wasn't used to this, hearing people compliment his look. He had been confident a few years back, knowing he was in good shape and that his eyes and jawline were apparently making all the ladies swoon. Coming from Steve, literal Adonis, he couldn't help but be shy. "You sure know how to talk to a guy. Where were those suave words when we drank coffee last time?"

  
"It was a friendly meeting. I came here with a purpose in mind." Steve explained. "You can't expect me to be all professional and sharing war secrets every time."

  
"So you're saying this date night was just an excuse to proposition me." Bucky asked in reply, making sure both men were on the same board. He actually liked where this sweet talk was going.

  
"I could if you want to."

  
"You totally didn't have a mission, you just put on your uniform and came here knowing I couldn't resist. Wait, where's your shield? See, this is all fake. You're going to make me believe you jump on my rooftop and appear on my doorstep. You're not even Captain America."

  
Steve laughed softly, looking at Bucky as if he was the most beautiful thing he ever laid eyes on. Bucky appreciated the gesture and squirmed under the attention. "My shield is back at the tower, I left in on the plane. And yes I did jump, with no parachute may I add. Also, what did you say about you who couldn't resist? Are you insinuating you have trouble controlling yourself when I'm wearing the colors of our country." Steve teased.

  
"Ugh you did not just say that. Talk about a mood killer. You make it sound like I have a patriotic kink or something." The look on Steve's face was enough for Bucky to understand the silent question 'do you?'. "Don't give me that face, I do not have this kind of kink."

  
"But you do admit you have some kind of kinks?" Steve asked. Honestly, where did this whole pillow talk come from?

  
"That's enough. You came here so you could have a nice dinner and that's we're going to have. I am a man of my words, I'm going to be the best at dating. You're failing so far, however. You were supposed to bring takeout but apparently Mr America was too busy saving the world." Steve pouted in return but followed Bucky to his bedroom so he could grab a t-shirt and some sweatpants before cooking. He didn't have much in his fridge as a result but it will have to do. Bucky was slightly worried about the prospect of Captain America making dinner in his kitchen though. It all seemed a bit too much for his sanity.

 

*

 

After dinner, a delicious sauté with fresh vegetables Bucky didn't know he had, they did end up watching a movie, but not the one Bucky had picked initially. He had quite an impressive DVDs collection, and while it wasn't something he particularly bragged about, he was quite proud of the accomplishment. Being a bachelor veteran had his perks when it came to cinematic knowledge. Steve, who had literally spent most of the last century under ice than not, was obviously intrigued and picked up a movie people told him to watch over the past few years.

  
He really had tried his best to make up for lost time, reading books about the end of the war he participated in, the Cold War, recents attacks but also biographies of people who went down in history, articles about famous assassinates. He went to places, learned about the new technologies, internet being the most fascinating. The planes, trains and cars had changed, Steve was still wary about the subway, but he tried as much as he could to live like a man of this century. However, he was still lacking information when it came to the entertainment industry. Steve kept listening to the music of his time, Beyoncé and other current divas meaning nothing to him. TV shows he had troubled to follow but still enjoyed from time to time, even though he didn't fully understand the point of sitting in front of a TV screen or computer to do nothing but watch other people lives. People he didn't know for the greatest part. Tonight, Steve felt like finally watching Jaws and Bucky was quick to agree.

  
They were both sitting on the couch, Steve's right arm on the back of the couch and Bucky's head resting on his shoulder, his side plastered to Steve's who didn't seem to mind one bit if the soft smile on his face was any indication. Bucky had seen this movie countless times before and as a result was more focused on Steve than the plot, but the other man was enthralled. When Bucky mentioned that up until a few years back there was an attraction based on the movie at Universal Studios, Steve was about ready to cry he missed it.

  
This comment led to a much more in depth conversation afterwards and Bucky regretted his off remark almost immediately, the movie still playing but long forgotten. Steve was suffering more than he let on. The time he had spent out of this world was something he would never get back and no matter how much technology has evolved, he knew there was no such thing as time machine.

  
Most of the time he didn't even understand why scientists found it exciting to unfreeze him, except for some twisted joke maybe. Sacrificing himself back in 1945 was Steve's choice, he wanted to die knowing he saved his people. When he woke up, Steve felt like his choice to die as a hero hasn't even been respected, his sacrifice almost wasted. Waking up in the same body, with a whole new world who already knew everything about him felt too much. Everyone he had known back then was dead, his lost love was sick, and a company he knew nothing about was already recruiting him. When Bucky mentioned the SHIELD had allowed Steve to save more people, he replied it wasn't always enough. When young Steve Rogers first applied for the Army, he wanted to serve his country in the ongoing war. When becoming a super soldier, Steve had an appropriate mindset to overcome the obstacles and lead the troops.

  
Nowadays, Steve was just leading a bunch of superheroes who knew nothing about military training. They knew nothing about war, except for the ones they saw on television. Neither of them had slept on the ground with a constant fear of stray missiles. The world had named Steve the First Avenger but never did he really get the time to accept or refuse. It wasn't a proposition, a job offer, it was just one more mission. People who were pretending to know him thought he was the perfect man for the job but Steve barely knew who he was most of the days, how could other people know?

  
"I'm sorry for everything you've been through." Bucky eventually said, feeling small. It wasn't exactly how he planned for this date to go but he felt numb suddenly. He kept complaining about his missing arm when truly, that's all he lost. An arm. He still had his family, people who supported him, people who relied on him. Steve woke up alone and got steered towards a mission he didn't even want to fulfill.

  
Steve Rogers was indeed Captain America, a war hero and a national idol. He was also, and most importantly, just a guy living in a century he barely understood. Bucky sucked at dating, but he was good at listening to veterans who needed help.

  
Maybe with Steve he could learn both. Dating a ninety-six year old war hero sounded good.

  
(Natasha was about to be insufferable.)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> If you want to follow me on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/AyceekComics) — or if you're interested in my other works in the 1D fandom, follow this [link](http://archiveofourown.org/users/fuckuharold).
> 
> The Tumblr [masterpost](http://ayceekcomics.tumblr.com/post/152251736948/title-not-that-old-author-ayceek-rating-mature) is right there.


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